A little boy was attending his first wedding. After the service, his cousin asked him, "How many women can a man marry?" "Sixteen," the boy responded. His cousin was amazed that he had an answer so quickly. "How do you know that?"
"Easy," the little boy said. "All you have to do is add it up, like the Priest said, 4 better, 4 worse, 4 richer, 4 poorer."
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After a church service on Sunday morning, a young boy suddenly announced to his mother, "Mom, I've decided to become a minister when I grow up."
"That's okay with us, but what made you decide that?"
"Well," said the little boy, "I have to go to church on Sunday anyway, and I figure it will be more fun to stand up and yell, than to sit and listen."
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A 6-year-old was overheard reciting the Lord's Prayer at a church service: "And forgive us our trash passes, as we forgive those who passed trash against us."
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A boy was watching his father, a pastor, write a sermon. "
How do you know what to say?" he asked.
"Why, God tells me." the father replied.
"Oh, then why do you keep crossing things out?"
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After the Christening of his baby brother in church, little Johnny sobbed all the way home in the back seat of the car. His father asked him three times what was wrong.Finally, Johnny replied, "That priest said he wanted us brought up in a Christian home, and I want to stay with you guys!"
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Terri asked her Sunday School class to draw pictures of their favorite Bible stories. She was puzzled by Kyle's picture, which showed four people on an airplane, so she asked him which story it was meant to represent.
"The Flight to Egypt," was his reply.
Pointing at each figure, Ms. Terri said, "That must be Mary, Joseph, and Baby Jesus. But who's the fourth person?"
"Oh, that's Pontius - the pilot."
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The Sunday School Teacher asks, "Now, Lisa, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating?"
"No sir," little Lisa replies, I don't have to. My mom is a good cook."
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A college drama group presented a play in which one character would stand on a trap door and announce, "I descend into hell!"A stagehand below would then pull a rope, the trapdoor would spring, and the actor would drop from view.The play was well received. When the actor playing the part became ill, another actor who was quite overweight took his place. When the new actor announced, "I descend into hell!" the stagehand pulled the rope, and the actor began his plunge, but became hopelessly stuck. No amount of tuggingon the rope could make him descend.One student in the balcony jumped up and yelled: "Hallelujah! Hell is full!"
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A little girl was sitting on her grandfather's lap as he read her a bedtime story. From time to time, she would take her eyes off the book and reach up to touch his wrinkled cheek. She was alternately stroking her own cheek, then his again.
Finally she spoke up, "Grandpa, did God make you?"
"Yes, sweetheart," he answered, "God made me a long time ago."
"Oh," she paused, "Grandpa, did God make me too?"
"Yes, indeed, honey," he said, "God made you just a little while ago."
Feeling their respective faces again, she observed, "God's getting better at it, isn't he?"
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Davin asked me why it seems like God doesn't answer all of his prayers. I explained to Davin that God does answer his prayers but that God also gives us room to make choices in life, and gives us room to do the work needed to make our lives better. I then asked Davin to imagine would happen if God answered everyone's prayers so well that no one would ever have to work. What would it be like if Bob the Builder (one of his favorite cartoons) said a prayer to help get a house built and then God came down and built the whole house for Bob. What would happen then, would Bob be a builder anymore? Davin thinks for just a second then replies,"Bob would sit in his underwear all day and watch TV!".
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I always touch the top of her head, and then her toes. By the time I get to Jaelynn's heart, she is laughing and wriggling all over!
Special thanks to my dear friend, and adopted grandmother, Beryl, for passing this on. Sending LOTS of love your way!
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